20060929
11:47
mr. luo qinhao, i am.
2 yrs juz passed like tt. 2 yrs finally passed. which is which. when u think of the sufferings, the second sentence applies. when u see those happy moments n times wasted, the first sentence will be true. 2 yrs, many many things happened. friendship, seeing some darkside of man, learning to work at the right time.
remembered on the first morning i woke up in bmt. i had a question: am i going to wake up at fucking 5.30am every morning for the rest of my 2 yrs? seriously tt makes me wonder if i should be a trainee for 9 mths or something less than tt. but actually tt doesn't matter
much when it becomes a routine. i juz look forward to sleep early tt's all... hahaha. then came the 2nd barrier. 9 mths of 5.5 day week plus burnt weekends or something much less than tt? 9 mths of harsh training or something tt allows me to slack? after so much thought, yet i made it for the 9 mths of shit. been there done that.
friendship, seeing some darkside of man, learning to work at the right time. walking very very very fast with heavy load till i had abrasion in my arsehole. experienced starvation, killed 2 quails, carried heavy load through hilly terrain, sitting on a mountain with only underwear under the rain cuddling a guy, slept in the rain hugging the same guy. sounds gay? it's survival.
there r oso times i feel some emotions i nv felt before. like going overseas leaving a loved one for 2 weeks. seeing the loved one at the airport after the 2 weeks of shit. thinking of home & mom when starved and exhausted. a sudden burst of motivation to go on juz by the thought of her. e sense of accomplishment when a team emerges out of the vegetation when hope is hardly to be seen. the feeling of disappointing someone who holds high hopes on you. i juz cant recall everything at this very moment, think there's much more.
time to face reality.
e matrix had been too comfortable.
no more hopes on the 10th of every mth.
i wun be paid to slack ard anymore.
so......
bring it on, suckers!
redfox and drunkard realeased from the matrix as of today.
-redfox & drunkard lived again-
